Years after her appearance on "The Howard Stern Show," Calistra Zipper, America's favorite taxidermied girl, is missing, last seen in the vicinity of Hollywood, California. Several of her intimates, from notorious Club Kids to the mysterious Hollywood Diva Alexis Del Lago, ponder her character and circumstances. Calistra's concerned grandparents travel from New Jersey to find her and give her a proper burial; meanwhile her jealous and obsessive brother Marco has apparently kidnapped his sister, and is suspected of setting cemetery arson fires in protest, advocating compulsory Human Taxidermying of all deceased citizens. Also implicated in these ghastly transgressions of civilized decency, is their by-now unhinged father Anthony; mayhem and madness ensue to such an extent that the Psychiatrist-General of the State of California is forced to take action.

Decades in the making: "Whatever Happened To Calistra Zipper?" the 29-minute Streamlined Version soon to be unleashed onto an unsuspecting public.

"This is the most ridiculous thing ever filmed. It's going to make John Waters look like David Lean!" - Prof. Michael De Goes, Northridge University